15 February 2011 @ 01:48 pm
HELLO TO ANOTHER QUICKLY THROWN TOGETHER MIX FOR TYL AT [livejournal.com profile] sortinghat_rp. aka still very retarded. Er, or not as quickly really as I would've hoped, I meant to post this like over a month ago, and then forgot to write the fic for each track and alskjfasf yeah it turned into a mess OH WELL HERE YOU GO. Sorry for how long this took, [livejournal.com profile] umerus alskjfasdf.

ANYWAY. tl;dr - Matthew is an Auror, Antonio is a Death Eater. You do the math.


IN THE DEVIL'S TERRITORY ❢ MATTHEW & ANTONIO TYL FST



IN THE DEVIL'S TERRITORY
matthew and antonio tyl mix



GRIZZLY BEAR
boy from school

When Matthew was a kid and still new to Hogwarts, he learned very quickly who avoid. While his pureblood status saved him from a few of the bullies - or at least the ones that managed to notice him - there was one boy in particular who seemed to hate him without Matthew doing anything at all (well, at least that he could remember doing). The third time Antonio pushed him down the stairs, Matthew shakily demanded to know why he kept doing such things.

"I hate Kirklands," Antonio simply said, walking away and allowing Gilbert to dump water all over Matthew instead.

Matthew tried very hard to avoid that trio (which quickly became two) from then on.

After Antonio got a job teaching in Matthew's last year, Matthew had spent the better half of the year coming to terms with the fact that Antonio was a hell of a lot different - and both of them had grown up quite a bit.

And I was a boy from school
Helplessly helping all the rules
And there was a boy at school
Hopelessly wrestling all his fools


SANDERS BOHLKE
the weight of us

"We'd like you to spy for us."

The proposal had hung around in Antonio's head for weeks - after all, it wasn't an easy decision to make. It meant leaving Lovino for one, probably without letting him know the truth. It meant going almost into hiding, cutting off ties with the rest of his friends. There was no guarantee he'd even survive, let alone do his job. It meant a hell of a lot of sacrifice, and Antonio wasn't exactly the least selfish person alive. Nor was he the most decisive person, but that was another matter.

He'd gone back to the Auror office, half in mind to just decline - he was sure they could find another person from his family, or maybe another wizard with lots of connections that would do a much better job. He'd been surprised to see a group of young wizards and witches in the corner, looking like they were being shown around the office. He was even more surprised when he found himself recognizing some of them - namely a rather tall and usually hard to notice blond man. (Goodness, he'd gotten tall!) He quickly realized that they were his students, and some he had even gone to school with.

"Oh, those are the new recruits," the kindly old Auror had answered, noticing Antonio's eye. "With this war getting worse as the years go on, we'll need all the help we can get."

Antonio had paused for another moment - Lovino would be waiting in the kitchen with an angry little scowl on his face, Emmeline would come over for hot chocolate and Thijs close in tow, Gilbert and Francis would come over later for drinks - and then gave a smile. "When can I start?"

There's a cold heart, burried beneath,
And warm blood, running deep.
Secrets - are mine to keep
Protected by silent sleep
I'm not ready, I'm not ready
For the weight of us, for the weight of us


SNOW PATROL
somewhere a clock is ticking

Once Matthew got his legs as an Auror, he still didn't exactly find the whole going to war aspect easy. It didn't take long before their numbers started to slowly dwindle, or for more bodies to start turning up where they shouldn't. It really was war, and Matthew had found himself right in the middle of it.

No matter what the others said, no matter how much Matthew steeled his nerves, he could still feel that faint pounding of fear in his head and his heart. Every time a spell missed his heart, every time he felt the rush of his blood in his veins as he escaped death one more time, he could feel that pounding. It was like watching a clock slowly tick in his head, and he wasn't quite sure when it would stop.

It was even stranger still hearing it affect people he thought it wouldn't. Like old friends, old acquaintances, and a certain smiling professor that was suddenly missing in action.

I've got this feeling that there's something that I missed
(I could do most anything to you...)
Don't you breathe
Something happened, that I never understood
You can't leave
Every second, dripping off my fingertips
Wage your war
Another soldier, says he's not afraid to die
Well I am scared


TV ON THE RADIO
i was a lover

It had felt like Antonio had been doing this double faced thing forever, rather than just a couple of years. He could feel the ache in his bones, and he found himself starting to stray. It wasn't like he longed for a simpler time or that he wanted to be "innocent" again - even he didn't have that lofty of a goal. Really, he just wanted to go home.

Maybe he wasn't cut out to be in a war - the rush was dulling his nerves, the fear was making him tense and stressed. Or maybe it was just the overhanging doubt that what he was doing was really even helping anyone. Or that after all this he could go back home and pretend that nothing had ever happened.

The small connections he maintained didn't really help - Francis was a good friend, but only seeing him once every few months or so to divulge information wasn't really relaxing, and he hardly knew any of the Aurors well enough to be their friends. The ones he did know he didn't even interact with - like his old students for example, especially one that was hard to notice (did he have an invisibility cloak or something?), even on the field of battle. Making friends with any of the Death Eaters was just a disturbing thought in and of itself.

He supposed he was just tired. Taxed. Not enough people to trust and too many ready to kill him. Maybe that was why he was eventually caught. And why he fell so easily into being just a Death Eater and not very two faced at all anymore.

We're just busy tempting, like fate's on the nod
Running on empty, bourbon and god
It's been a while since we knew the way
And it's been even longer since our plastic priest class
Had a goddamned thing to say
I was a lover before this war


SUFJAN STEVENS
in the devil's territory

Matthew thought it had just been rumors at first. After all, it had been nearly a year since anyone had heard from Antonio - and nearly a year since Matthew had caught a fleeting glimpse in Sweden. Rumors of a lanky, Spanish accented man among the ranks of Death Eaters could mean quite a few things. After all, the only reason Antonio had even been there in the first place was because of all his family being part of it, and Matthew was quite sure that there were quite a few lanky men in the Fernández family. Matthew also felt quite sure that out of anything, Antonio was dead.

But there was a nagging feeling in the back of Matthew's head, as if he was missing something. As if seeing that one glimpse of him with a ring and a sad smile on his face should mean something more than Matthew thought. He wasn't even sure if that was Antonio.

But still, he couldn't ignore that worry in the back of his stomach, or the clench he felt in his throat when another death by the same tanned hands was brought to his attention.

I saw the dragons drying
I saw the witches whine
We stayed a long, long time
But I'm not afraid to die
To see you, to meet you
To see you last


YEASAYER
strange reunions

At first, Matthew had felt very angry. He hadn't known Antonio as well as others - he assumed that Gilbert was the angriest of all, or maybe Lovino - but he still felt the betrayal. The man had been his teacher, and a mentor of sorts afterwards. Even if they had never been close, or gotten along the best, Antonio had still been a constant presence in Matthew's life. A presence that was happy and warm as they'd aged, not that cruel little child that stuck his face into the toilets again.

Maybe part of him had been stuck in thinking that people like Antonio in his life would never really change, even during a war. That old acquaintances would be the one constant thing in this mess. Maybe he just didn't think that someone as cheerful and happy as him could turn so sour again.

All Matthew knew now is that he had a warrant for that man's death, and that wand in his hand felt heavier and heavier with each step he took towards it.

Don't ask me for any favors
And I won't ask how you're doing
Leave me alone
'Cause after all,
Dealing with you is a nuisance


MUSE
the small print

For once in his life, being unnoticeable had become the most useful skill Matthew had. Even Death Eaters would practically ignore his presence, and with that skill in tow, Matthew suddenly became one of the best Aurors in his generation.

All Matthew cared was that he wasn't getting fired at with spells quite as often, at least not when he could sneak around and strike them first. With Yekaterina and a baby waiting for him at home, suddenly coming home safe was a lot more important, and Matthew thanked his lucky stars that he could.

Especially when he was giving chase to a man he'd once thought of as a friend.

Matthew had learned more than he cared to know about him - his family background, all old friends and acquaintances (how odd to see his name on a list for once), what he liked to eat, what he liked to read, where he went when he wanted to be alone. Of course, half of that didn't mean much when your target was on the run, and had one hell of a force covering his tracks for him.

Still, Matthew at least had a few comforts - even if it was as small as speaking French with Antonio's French friend and old connection, and trying to figure out just why a man like Antonio would do such a thing. In a smoke filled bar, with Francis laughing brokenly in his face, sometimes it didn't seem like any of it made sense at all. That maybe this was a separate Antonio, and he wasn't chasing the man that a few too many had placed their trust in.

But those weren't thoughts he couldn't afford to have, especially when more and more were dying every day, and he had a home to get to. Antonio had left his life behind - all those friends, his family (minus those who were just as rotten), that life he'd built - and Matthew didn't have to care why. He just had to care why he had to stop him, and that was enough to clutch his wand tight and trudge on.

Say, it'll make you insane
And it's bending the truth
You're to blame
For all the life that you'll lose
And you watch this space
But I'm going all the way


BELLE & SEBASTIAN
is it wicked not to care?

When Antonio had first gone missing, Matthew had been in Italy of all places, trying to work on a lead. He'd been wondering where in the hell he could've gone to - it wasn't like the man not to check in with Francis, and everyone had been worried. He'd been surprised to see Lovino wandering around, and had stopped him, hoping to find out if maybe Lovino had known where he'd gone to.

Maybe the way Lovino's eyes had narrowed and his jaw had clenched should've been a clue. Or maybe the way he pointedly hid part of his left hand, and stiffened when Matthew had congratulated him on that engagement ring on his finger. It wasn't until Matthew saw a ring on a tanned hand that hid behind a mask that he made the connection.

It was easier to ignore a man behind a mask - you could easily believe there wasn't a man behind it, or make the connection that there was anything else other than a killer. But, sometimes, Matthew would catch Antonio without his mask on (especially in those places in Sweden, what on earth was that man searching for), he quickly realized that the man looked... sad. Maybe the sadness unnerved Matthew more than anything - most Death Eaters didn't look sad. They looked proud, or happy, or scared - just not sad.

Instead he was put face to face with a man that would smile at him sadly and ask about the weather, or how his wife was, or how things had been lately. And suddenly, Matthew had a very sour taste in his mouth, and that wand would slip just enough to let the man run.

Counting acts and clutching thoughts
By the river where the moss grows
Over rocks the water running all the time
Is it wicked when you smile
Even though you feel like crying
Even though you could be sick at any time?


( But if there was a sequel
Would you love me as an equal?
Would you love me until I'm dead? )


BEAR MCREARY
martial law

Antonio would sometimes cleverly forget that he was in the middle of a war. He'd been stuck running and hiding for so long, he almost felt removed from it all. But then, he'd be back in the middle of it all, running away from a man that really did have a wand in his hands, and not just a rumor of one.

Antonio felt he liked the fighting a little better - it was easier to forget why he felt so sick and tired when he had to run. It was easier to forget that he couldn't go home when a man was threatening to take his life from him. It was easier to forget that pressure on the back of his neck, or the weight of the ring on his finger.

And sometimes, letting out a spell, throwing out an attack was a bit of a release. He could feel the stress feel a little less on his shoulders when the crack of magic sounded out. He could feel a little less tense when that power followed through him.

Even when he was fighting against a friend, that unsettling churn of his stomach and mind wouldn't hit him until later. Later, when he was alone again, watching the war from a distance, and starting to forget why he was fighting in the first place.

( Instrumental )

MY BRIGHTEST DIAMOND
the good & the bad guy

At first, Matthew blamed himself for all the times he'd let Antonio slip by him. He'd have moments of weakness when that man had his mask off, he'd suddenly find questions tying up his tongue instead of spells or curses or charms. But, he quickly realized in those moments, Antonio always let him go as well.

Oh, they'd fought before - Antonio's magic was potent and sometimes even too strong for the man who cast it. And Matthew was no bad shot - he'd seen Antonio limp away before, even with the mask hiding his face from view.

But when they were suddenly alone, without the pressures of the war behind them, all Matthew could think of was the teacher who laughed and showed him strange creatures. All that hate he'd built up over the years seemed easily forgotten, and he'd remember people telling him "he can't be bad, he can't."

And the first time Antonio very pointedly let Matthew go when he had the upper hand, Matthew could suddenly hear that same phrase ringing in his own head.

Why does it hurt more to recall
Your good side
I always went to you for advice
You were a wise one then
When I think about you in that time
It's harder to hate you then
But sometimes I want to hate you as the bad guy
But I want you, the good & the bad guy


ARCADE FIRE
intervention

When Matthew had very suddenly woken up in Hogwarts, after all the years he'd been gone from the place, it was probably the strangest he'd felt in a while. The war was suddenly where they'd tried to keep it away from, and he felt uneasy in far too many ways for comfort. But, they were also suddenly so far away from that war - Hogwarts made him feel like he was a kid again, that he was safe, even with known Death Eaters wandering around in its walls. Or maybe just having Yekaterina smile at him with those watery eyes was all it took for him to feel safe again, and he suddenly did not want to leave.

Maybe it was the lingering feeling of safety that kept him from killing Antonio on sight, or from ignoring the man when he specifically contacted him over those old journals they used to use. He'd been trying to think of ways to peacefully end their little chase, especially with Antonio so willingly giving himself up.

Instead, he found himself face to face with Antonio, hovering protectively in front of Emmeline and Lovino - two people he'd thought were dead by Antonio's own hand. He saw that worry and that relief that he'd been experiencing in Yekaterina's arms in Antonio's eyes, and something in him broke. Maybe it had been a long time coming - maybe all those chance meetings and those old memories had prevent him from doing something he would've regretted now. Maybe it was just luck they'd avoided killing each other up until now. But whatever the reason, Matthew suddenly found himself cutting a deal that sent Antonio into hiding and quite a few Death Eaters into Matthew's hands.

When he was sneaking the small group out, trying to keep them away from the Death Eaters that would most likely be out to kill them as soon as word got out, Matthew saw Antonio smile. "Thank you," was all he said, and Matthew could only smile back, watching as Antonio's hands clasped around Emmeline and Lovino's as they ran away.

We can't find you now,
But they're going to get their money back somehow,
And when you finally disappear
We'll just say you were never here
Been working for the church
While your life falls apart,
Singing hallelujah with the fear in your heart,
Every spark of friendship and love
Will die without a home
Hear the soldier groan, "We'll go at it alone"


SURROGATE
death penalty

It had been very strange at first, trying to suddenly adjust to being ten years younger again and losing all those scars (and half of the memories) they'd had. Antonio could just as easily remember the last few days - which had somehow been in the future and not in the future - just as well as he could the days just before it. That weight in his chest felt strange, like he shouldn't have it after all of this.

Instead, he was laughing with Matthew sitting awkwardly at his side. "Just imagine," Antonio said, still trying to play with a ring he didn't have. "What if that had continued on? That it wasn't just a glimpse, that it was our lives, and we had to continue on."

Matthew had just shifted uncomfortably - Antonio figured he probably didn't know what to do with a teacher he'd been trying to kill for the better half of ten years. Antonio didn't know what to do with a student that had just saved him and two people he loved dearly from a choice he'd never wanted in the first place. After a long pause, Matthew finally sighed. "I don't know. But it didn't."

Antonio had just stared off into same direction Matthew was, trying to force the thoughts of possibilities and things he never wanted to do out of his head. He was surprised when he felt Matthew's hand on his shoulder, giving him a shy sort of smile that Antonio felt like he hadn't seen in years. "At least it's a fresh start, right?"

Antonio paused for a moment himself, before giving a smile back. "It is."

And even after Gilbert erased his memory of ten years that didn't happen, Antonio still felt like smiling at Matthew, even if he didn't quite know why anymore. There were a lot of years to make up.

I was painfully aware
I was painfully unprepared
Though I did my best to make everything right
And I spent some time alone
On the surface of the sun
And I burned away to what I once was
All that time I have wasted
All that time I was wasted


LISTEN TO IT HERE
DOWNLOAD IT HERE
 
 
Current Music: Arcade Fire: Intervention
Current Mood: uncomfortable
 
 
( Read comments )
Post a comment in response:
This account has disabled anonymous posting.
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.
More info about formatting